By Sadaf Abbassi, M.A student of Career Counseling

7 things to do when your coworker is being mean

April 22, 2019 - 10:35

TEHRAN-- Workplace is just like a mini-world, you can find every type of people there: the nice ones and of course the difficult ones! Sometimes you may realize that your coworker is not cooperative, maybe he/she rolls his/her eyes on you when talking to you or has told your boss that you haven't delivered the project on time, which of course you have had!

Or even so simply, your gut is telling you that with no reason, she or he doesn't like you!  It's a pain in the neck, isn't it? What would you do in such situations? I admit it's the last thing you expect from a good coworker but you have to face the reality, your coworker is being mean to you! Here is what you should do to win the invisible ongoing fight:

1. Do your job flawlessly

Make sure you do your job well. It gives you a comfort against any possible accusation. Showing your best at work not only makes you a good and trustworthy employee, but also leaves your mean coworker with no alibi to say that you have done a mistake or he or she can’t destroy your career in any way or point the finger on you that you are rightfully guilty.

2. Don’t forget about being assertive

Assertiveness is a skill that allows you to defend your rights while you do not hurt others feelings. Don’t be shy and speak your mind about the work and do not be afraid of being judged. There are so many sources on assertiveness you can find. Practice it in real life step by step and measure your improvement.

3. Don’t let your anger leads you to a fight

I know! Your coworker made you lose your temper! You want to shout and tell him/her such an idiot he/she is to blame you for a mistake or sabotaging your work. But please calm down and do not let emotions take over you. Take a deep breath, drink water or do whatever gives you pleasure. Tell yourself that you will respond to your coworker’s action with your right mind!

4. Disarm him/her with your kindness

Sometimes people are mean to you because they think you are better than them in so many ways. Maybe your coworker is jealous of you, maybe she or he is having tough times in his or her personal life and is not able to keep the mental balance. Considering these possibilities helps you to hate him or her less and take easy on what is going on. I know it is difficult but take the initiative to treat him or her nicely to make your coworker drop his or her guard.

5. Be careful about your insecurities

Sometimes your coworker is mean, yes, but this is your insecurity that magnifies his or her acts and causes you so much suffering. Take some time to be fair and realistic about what is happening inside you. Are you really mad at your coworker because of what he or she does or says or it is your bitter memories that he or she awakes? Maybe you need to see a psychologist to discuss your issues.

6. Mindfulness is your best friend at work

Again and again stay mindful! Be aware of what is going on inside and outside of you. You better be present at the moment to give the appropriate response. You also need to keep yourself from screaming at work or doing any rude or stupid act by getting angry.

7. Look closer, maybe she/he's not that mean!

And finally, you have to look closer! Some people have problem interacting with others. They are not evil but it is not easy for them to act friendly. Maybe all you need is time to find out who he or she really is and to know his or her intentions.

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